The HipHop Series
by basket-of-posies
Summary: It hurt them all but made everything so, so much better.  GregRyan, GregNick, EricRyan  one sided
1. I Try So Hard

Eric switched lovers like (most) people changed their underwear. He tried girls, he tried guys; short, tall; dark, pale; funny, cute; dominatrixes, whipped sons of mothers; everything. There was no such thing as the perfect match for him.

He snapped too much at the wrong times, he wanted too much when others couldn't give anymore. He wanted love, he wanted commitment, but he wanted space. He wanted to take it slow but he wanted the full experience. Their world would have to revolve around him but at the same time, they'd have to be able to put him in his place.

They'd have to look good with him; if they weren't compatible physically, they'd never be able to be compatible emotionally. Their hands would have to be the right size to slip right into his own and they couldn't be too tall or too short, because he was definitely a cuddler and he loved others' heads on his shoulder. Their skin couldn't be too soft nor too rough, it had to be the perfect mix of years of hard work and tender touches.

Any time he found a good mix of a few qualities he liked, he'd find more aspects he couldn't stand. Eric wanted to give up, he was done with this game. But each night, he continued his cycle; each night, a new name to add to his list of one night stands.

Whenever it did evolve into something more, they'd always run away. Eric worked late, he worked long hours. His job required him to see what most people would never imagine; he conversed with criminals and victims of various crimes daily; others just didn't understand why he did what he did.

His only solution would be to date someone from work, but that was risky... Though, for the right person, Eric would risk it all.

_Ryan Wolfe_; if Ryan wanted Eric like Eric wanted Ryan, he'd have no problem risking what he had earned in his field of work. Deliberately, no, but if he had to choose between love and his career, he'd have to choose love. _True love only comes around once, catch it while you can_. Eric was sure what he felt was true; he was sure Ryan was the reason that no one else could ever put up with him.

The only problem with Eric's feelings were Ryan's feelings... or lack of, back.

Every day, Eric would flirt almost endlessly with his co-worker and he'd always get a smile back, along with some playful banter. Though the smile made his insides melt, he knew it wasn't the same smile Ryan would be giving someone else later that night.

At the end of each day, Eric watched Ryan leave and walk into his boyfriend's arms. He would greet Ryan with a kiss and they'd walk, side by side, hand in hand, off to one of their cars.

Eric crumbled at the sight, everyday a little bit of him broke. He hated picturing Ryan with the other man, he hated the other man for taking Ryan away from him, he hated Greg Sanders for moving all the way from Las Vegas just to be with him. He hated him so, so much but respected him much more because he made Ryan smile that beautiful smile of his and made him happier than Eric ever could. 

And each day, Eric would sigh and look away and every night, he'd find someone else to spend it with. Sometimes they had green eyes, other times they had brown hair, sometimes they were built just like Ryan, he even found someone who could pass as his brother; but it was never enough, it was never the real thing. Eric was left alone because Ryan found who he belonged with, and that killed him.


	2. You Had My Heart

Greg was leaving today... leaving his job, leaving Vegas, leaving Nick alone. When he had given his two weeks' notice, his excuse was personal reasons. Grissom tried to persuade him with his odd Grissom mind control but Greg wouldn't budge; his mind was set.

The only information the rest of the lab knew was that he was going to work in Miami, in one of the best labs in the country, but not for law enforcement.

They didn't know that Greg and Nick had once been a thing; that Nick still felt strongly about Greg, that inside, Nick was falling apart; and the most important thing they didn't know was that Greg was leaving them to be with his _new_ lover.

They had been together for nearly a year, having met at a convention a year and a half ago. Nick thought they wouldn't last, the distance was too great, it was at least 3000 miles, there was no way that they could work... he hoped.

But it seemed that the heavenly deities were on Greg's side and it worked.

After a year (Nick figured this), one or the other had to sacrifice their lives to start a new one... and it had to be Greg. They must have discussed it millions of times; Greg loved the west coast, he would never leave unless he was completely serious about what he had, and apparantly... he was.

Nick let out a sigh and closed his eyes, trying to get the image of Greg hugging everyone goodbye out of his mind. It hurt too much to let reality sink in; maybe if he ignored the stabbing feeling at his heart, he could go on without revealing too much of his internal struggles.

His mind drifted back to the time when he and Greg were together, when all he cared about was making him smile, when everything was okay... they were good times and they were limited, but they were the only thing he had left to hang on to.

He was brought back from his reveries with a soft 'hey' from a voice he knew too well and would miss too much.

"Hey," He said just as softly, opening his eyes to meet Greg's.

"I just wanted to say goodbye..." Greg said with a small, sad smile.

Nick mirrored the smile back and stood to wrap his arms around Greg in a hug, "I'm gunna miss you, y'know."

"I know," Greg said quietly, hugging Nick back, "I'm sorry... things didn't work."

"I'm sorry, too," Nick murmured and let go before anyone started to assume things. "But hey, I'm happy for you, really."

"Thanks," Greg smiled, his eyes lighting up with happiness with just the mere thought of his future, "I'm happy, too."

"That's all that matters, Greggo," Nick grinned, "I hope everything works out... with Ryan."

"Yeah, me too," He smiled back, "So I guess this is goodbye?"

"Yeah, I guess so," Nick smiled sadly, "Later."

Greg smiled and shook his head, "Yeah, later."

And he walked away... walked out of the lab, out of Nick's eyes, out of Nick's life, and Nick crumbled inside at the sight of his retreating back.


	3. Clear It Out

**Clear It Out**

Greg turned the volume up on his iPod and slid down into a more comfortable position; he had an 8-hour flight ahead of him, might as well catch some sleep.

The plane started to move and Greg looked out the window, mindlessly viewing the other planes and otherwise empty lot. His thoughts drifted back to what he was leaving behind; his friends, his work, his life. There were memories there he could never replace and he hoped he'd never forget; the good, the bad, the ugly... everything. He was leaving it all, for Ryan.

Ryan, he smiled, Ryan was worth it. He could make the painful thoughts go away and make him smile with just his laugh. Ryan could smile and in his eyes, Greg saw the world as a child again. No crimes, no pain, no spite, nothing but the love he could feel radiating off the other man.

The plane hit some turbulence and shook Greg out of his thoughts momentarily. He turned his head from the window and stared down at his iPod. Nick had given it to him for his birthday... when they were together. Greg smiled sadly at that long-ago time.

Nick had been everything he wanted; he was kind, he was strong, his smile brightened up any room, and he was _great_ in bed... but he just didn't _go_ with Greg.

Greg was too free-spirited, he was always moving, always wanting to do something else; Nick would rather spend a quiet night at home. They never really fought or agrued... just disagreed, a lot.

When the end of the relationship came, Greg knew Nick was hurting more than he was. His love never died for Nick, it just simmered down a bit. There'd always be a place for Nick in his life but 'lover' just wasn't for him, brother was.

After Nick was a strand of one-night stands (Warrick included, but Greg wasn't going to get into that), then came the convention and Ryan... beautiful, flawed Ryan.

He was clean and neat while Greg was messy and unorganized; he'd try new things to broaden his horizons, Greg did it just because he could; he calmed Greg's craziness and Greg brought him out of his shell. They were so similar but at the same time, so different, that they just _worked_.

Greg closed his eyes and thought about everything he had experienced in Vegas; the explosion, his promotion, getting beat up, court trials, his surrogate family... everything that shaped him to be what he was today and he was leaving it... for Ryan.

Tears slid down his cheek; tears of love, of joy, of sadness, of confusion because he didn't know if he was ready for this, ready to build a new life so late in his career, ready to be with Ryan for the rest of his life.


	4. Lose My Breath

-1**Lose My Breath**

Ryan walked out of the lab into the humid heat of the Miami air, a great difference from the artificial cool atmosphere of the lab. He felt a bead of sweat forming on his temple and quickly wiped it away with the cuff of his sleeve.

He started complaining about the heat in his mind of course, and walked down the stairs. He was so engrossed in his little argument over the heat and effects of sun that he didn't notice Greg until he was being lifted up by waist.

"HEY!" He was about to bop whoever it was on the head until he looked down and saw the dirty blonde hair with odd highlights and grinned.

"Hey," Greg grinned back as he set Ryan down in front of him, "What's up?"

"Well, now that _you're_ here..."

"You've been hanging around me too long," Greg laughed, throwing an arm around Ryan's shoulders, and led them to his car

Ryan grinned and leaned into Greg; surprisingly, this made him feel better, not hotter. "And that's a bad thing?"

"Only if you think so," Greg smirked and pushed Ryan against his car, keeping him there with his hips.

"Is this appropriate behavior, Mr. Sanders?" Ryan teased, his hands playing with Greg's collar, "We're still on the police department's property, y'know."

"Well then, slap some 'cuffs on me because I can't resist this," He smirked and kissed Ryan; Ryan complied happily, encouraged it even; what else would you call his hands gripping Greg's hair and pulling him closer? 

When they pulled apart, Ryan was breathless and Greg was grinning. It was a habit that Ryan's heart always sped up and his breathing stopped when Greg kissed him. 

"Keep it in your pants, Wolfe!" Someone called out from behind Greg and Ryan blushed redder than the stripes on the American flag; he knew exactly who that was… Eric Delko.

He looked over Greg's shoulder and saw the smug look on Eric's face and something else in his eyes that Ryan couldn't place. He was leaning against a tree, looking like he was the best looking man in the city and he knew it, but he wasn't to Ryan… not anymore. 

Ryan smiled over at him and shook his head.

"You know that guy?" Greg asked, looking back at Eric.

"Yeah, he's a friend, he's just pushing my buttons," Ryan explained, "How about we go home, huh?"

"Oh, right," Greg laughed and unlocked the door for Ryan, then opened it. "You always make me do that."

Ryan chuckled and took his seat, "Do what, exactly?" He asked as Greg sat down and closed his door.

"Lose my common sense," Greg smiled at him and started the car.

Ryan grinned and leaned back in his seat, turning his head to stare out the window. He saw Eric eying him with something written on his face that Ryan couldn't explain. There was envy, jealousy, sadness, happiness… such a mixture that Ryan couldn't choose just one word so he just looked away.

His eyes wandered to the sky and his thoughts to Greg. He'd been here for nearly a month and Ryan still couldn't believe it; no more long distance phone calls, scarce visits, or e-mails, Greg was _here_, with him.

He could kiss him everyday, he laid in his arms every night, and everything was perfect. His kisses grew better and only made Ryan melt more than ever before; he accepted Ryan's OCD and even helped him with it; he went with Ryan like sand went with the beach and rocks went with mountains; Greg was made to be with Ryan and Ryan, with Greg.

Looking over at Greg, Ryan smiled and reached out to hold the hand that was currently fiddling with the radio.

"There's nothing good on," Greg whined, pouting because he couldn't play with the radio anymore.

"Watch the road," Ryan rolled his eyes and looked for a station that Greg would like; he ended up just turning it off. There _was_ nothing good on. "No music, so I'll just enjoy the scenery," Ryan smirked and turned in his seat so he could have a better view of Greg.

"Ry, you _live_ here," Greg rolled his eyes and looked at Ryan, only to see him staring back, "Oh, me."

"That's right; I don't need music, you'll keep me entertained."

"But what about _me_?"

"We'll work on that later."


End file.
